Things I hate

Pumpkinsanity has reached its overdue spicy end

8C93151074F1CC548DD2660A37CAC_h316_w628_m5_ckHIHztjrPumpkin Spice has always been the worst of the artificial seasonal flavors.

While the more ambitious spices went on to marry David Beckham, Pumpkin Spice was reduced to licking a sledge hammer for attention while also stinking up everything from lattes to M&Ms to condoms to donuts to beer to soy milk to vodka to Pringles each and every fall.


(Pringles? That’s just disgusting, but also pure white trash perfection.)

But now it’s over.

How do I know?

Uh, suddenly everyone hates you.

1. Real newspapers say you suck.

2. Jezebel compares you (unfavorably) to the Plague. 

3. HuffPo says you’re a straight up murderer.

4. Hipsters are ironically coming to your defense. 

5. Saturday Night Live has turned you (rather hilariously) into a douche.

Give our regards to Baby Spice.

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