Thinking and writing about food. Not always in that order.

Archive for October, 2013|Monthly archive page

Pumpkinsanity has reached its overdue spicy end

In Things I hate on October 29, 2013 at 8:43 pm

8C93151074F1CC548DD2660A37CAC_h316_w628_m5_ckHIHztjrPumpkin Spice has always been the worst of the artificial seasonal flavors.

While the more ambitious spices went on to marry David Beckham, Pumpkin Spice was reduced to licking a sledge hammer for attention while also stinking up everything from lattes to M&Ms to condoms to donuts to beer to soy milk to vodka to Pringles each and every fall.

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(Pringles? That’s just disgusting, but also pure white trash perfection.)

But now it’s over.

How do I know?

Uh, suddenly everyone hates you.

1. Real newspapers say you suck.

2. Jezebel compares you (unfavorably) to the Plague. 

3. HuffPo says you’re a straight up murderer.

4. Hipsters are ironically coming to your defense. 

5. Saturday Night Live has turned you (rather hilariously) into a douche.

Give our regards to Baby Spice.

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