I was pretty sure today is supposed to be Friday, but recently discovered that I am wrong. That leaves me: A) heartbroken and B) too tired to complain my way through an entire blog post. (And that is a pretty low standard of achievement, indeed.)
So, today I’m outsourcing the complaints. Fortunately, other people are feeling feisty.
1. Alton Brown : from his blog.
“Have you ever noticed that molecular gastronomy sucks?”
Alton wants people to learn how to saute a mushroom before they start playing with their chemistry sets. If I had more energy, I would join this bandwagon. Molecular gastronomy makes for some fun foams and whatnot, but I still think I prefer food.
Rating: 4 Andy Rooneys.
Alton used “snit” in the lede and his photo looks like he is severely constipated. Outstanding curmudgeon potential.
2. Some Guy Named Matt Lewis : Food and Wine
“Have you ever noticed that a lot of people treat cake like PlayDoh?”
This baker-guy named Matt Lewis (who’s probably really famous but I’m too tired to look him up) complains about all the ways that people ruin cakes.
Rating: 2 Andy Rooneys.
He calls out cupcakes and expresses disdain for cakes with toilet paper rolls inserted in them (take that Food Network Challenge lady with the tight bun.) I admire his effort, but there’s not as much vitriol as I like.
3. Christine Liu : America’s Test Kitchen Feed
“Have you ever noticed that food can be annoying?”
On the new America’s Test Kitchen blog site (which is pretty nice!), Christine asks for reader’s pet peeves about food.
Rating: 1 Andy Rooney.
Good marks for thinking to ask the question: what food trends do you find annoying? But mainly, she’s just asking and leaving the real complaining up to her readers. We’ll call that Curmudgeon 2.0.
Clearly, Alton Brown has the biggest bee in his bonnet today. And he wins the title of Guest Curmudgeon. With hope, the sheer sourness of Alton’s expression will inspire me to get up off my fainting couch and retire to my writing couch and type up a rant of my own. Thanks Alton.